“How could I? You’re never here.”
“I’m sorry.” Derian accepted the blame. Now
wasn’t the time to argue their long, complicated relationship. Now was the time
to draw on the love they’d always shared. “When did you find out?”
“He was first diagnosed with colon cancer
seven years ago.”
“You didn’t tell me even then?”
“I promised I wouldn’t. No one knew. He
didn’t want people to look at him and see a weak man.” Aud’s eyes clouded and
she hesitated, blinking. “As if he was ever that.”
Derian pulled out the folded linen
handkerchief in her pocket and handed it to her. She remembered doing the same
for Emily. “Does Martin know?”
“He’s one of the few. He’s been decent about
it, but I’m not sure what will happen now.”
“There’s a recurrence?”
“Yes, and it’s fairly widespread. There’s
treatment,” Aud said with false brightness, “and of course we’re all certain
he’s going to beat it back this time as well, but—”
“You don’t have to explain. Of course you’ll
be there in any way he needs you.” She squeezed Aud’s hand. “I’m really sorry.
If you need anything, if George needs anything, I’m here.”
“Are you, Dere?” Aud smiled sadly. “You’re
not, really, you know. Sometimes a person needs more than a voice on the phone
or a text.”
“I’m here now,” Derian said, and for the
first time, she realized she meant it. Her responsibilities no longer felt like
obligations heaped on her shoulders, forcing her to be a person she didn’t want
to be. She was becoming the person she wanted to be on her own terms. “I plan
to stay at the agency as long as I can, because the longer Henrietta takes to
recover, the better it will be for her long-term. And if you need me, or your
father does, I’ll be here after that.”
“Why? Why the sudden change?”
“People change,” Derian said softly. “Or
maybe they just grow into the people they always were.”
“How much of this sea change has to do with
Emily?”
Derian tensed. “I don’t know what you’re
talking about.”
“Don’t you?” Aud sighed wearily. “All right,
then. We’ll save that for another time.”
“Actually, I did want to ask you about her.”
Derian went back to eating, carefully and casually asking, “Explain to me about
this whole visa situation and why all of a sudden it’s a problem.”
“How much do you know?”
“Start at the beginning—small words.” She
listened carefully as she sipped her wine, her appetite waning as Aud described
the miasma of agencies, quotas, applications, approvals, and vicissitudes of
the immigration process. In the end she wondered how anyone ever made their way
through the system. “So what’s the procedure to straighten all this out?”