The problem with N appeared to settle again later in May. Harald Olesen expressed his concern about the situation in Greece following the military coup and uncertainty as to how Norway should respond. N was not mentioned at all again for the rest of May. Instead, a new mystery letter cropped up on 15 May: D came to visit – actually came into my flat today. Once inside the door, D’s face changed completely. Was glad to still be alive when he left. Know only too well what D is capable of. A bad night – got up twice to check that the safety chain was on.
June and July passed with only short entries about people he knew, a couple of longer passages about the Six-Day War in the Middle East and the riots in the USA. Harald Olesen spent a considerable amount of time keeping himself informed of what was going on in the world, via the newspapers, radio and television. But his personal problems returned with a vengeance in the autumn. In August, there were suddenly two short entries, separated only by a note on the USA’s increasing military involvement in Vietnam.
12 August: N still hounding me for money. Where will this end?
27 August: Another aggressive conversation with D. My illness is getting worse and therefore also my dilemma. I want to speak out, but D rejects this point blank – and is now threatening me.
It was clear that Harald Olesen’s situation was deteriorating rapidly, and also his health. Through September there were more and more brief entries about pain and appointments with the doctor. The local elections at the end of the month were dealt with in only a few lines. And two new letters appeared, only a few days apart.
21 September: O, whom I have not seen for over 20 years, contacted me. O was extremely concerned that our activities and those of others from back then remained secret forever. I agreed and said that I would sort out the papers.
29 September: J has also contacted me now. Arouses sympathy. Impossible to sleep afterwards. Great dilemma.
Olesen appeared more or less to lose his appetite for world affairs in October and November. The much-discussed deaths of Che Guevara and the last emperor of China were given no more than a line each, as were that autumn’s Vietnam demonstrations in Oslo. Instead, there were a growing number of entries about health problems. These culminated dramatically in the middle of Advent.
12 December: Dramatic conclusion following another examination by the doctor. The end is only months away. The thought of death is light as a feather, whereas the greatest decision of my life weighs on me like lead.