…» was beating in his head. «Oh God, why should I pretend to be calm when I’m ready to die for just one hug…»
The memories of feeling her body pressing onto him there in the police station drove him crazy, and Jeff damned all conventions of society forbidding them to listen to the calls of their hearts.
Vera glanced around at all the people in the playground, then, lowering her head, she started drawing again. Taking himself under control, Jeff sighed and looked at her work.
It showed the playground, however, not exactly as in reality. He saw in the picture a black police officer sitting on the bench at the edge of the playground, but when Jeff looked at the real bench, it was empty.
«Did he go away?» Jeff asked, pointing to the image of the policeman. A sly grin appeared on Vera’s lips.
«No, he’s always with me,» she replied, significantly glancing at him.
Suddenly he understood, and, struck with her phrase, he stood still and could not even breathe, with agonizing pain in his heart, as if a bandit thrust a knife straight into his chest.
«I’ll kill Oleg,» he thought, feeling hot with love and desperation. «Sure, you’ll do it, Othello, go ahead! Who am I kidding? But maybe I should talk to him… Oh, I can imagine a dialogue with that cracker! „Massa, I love your wifey! Could you be so kind as to give freedom to her, so I can marry her?“ Damn, it would have sounded so stupid…»
Vera did not look at Jeff. Just yesterday she decided to talk with Oleg, yet when he entered the apartment and she saw him concerned and upset about something, she held her tongue. «After dinner,» she told herself, calmly giving her husband his meal.
When he’d finished, the woman was ready to tell him about her decision, but Oleg hugged her, and uttered passionately, «I’m so happy to have you. I can’t even imagine what I’d do without your support.» He kissed her, and left the apartment again, and she told him nothing. She heard him driving away, and for a long time, tormented with her guilty feelings, Vera cried and damned herself.
* * * * *
«What do you think about Marina?» The question from Jeff returned Vera to the present, and she looked at him with surprise, «What do you mean?»
«I mean…» He faltered. «Her affair with Professor VanStein.»
«First of all.» Grach averted her eyes. «I’m sure it’s just empty talk. Second, I know she truly loves him. We all told her many times to hide her feelings better, but it’s so difficult… Am I right?» She looked into his face.
«About what?» Jeff mumbled, taken off guard.